I am not a fan of winter and I don't think that I ever have been. One snow day and a stiff cold breeze is all I need to make me yearn for warmer weather. Honestly, I think it's worse this winter because the weather and snowfall has been so much worse than we've had in a very long time, and I missed summer last season due to the surgery. Today is bright and full of sunshine despite the calf high snow drifts on my porch and I will definitely take sunny over dark and dreary.
I'm trying to get motivated to do some housework today, and like I said, the sunshine really helps. My CPAP machine has also really helped. I no longer wake up with headaches and am starting to feel like I really sleep at night. Now, I'm just waiting for the weather to be warm enough for me to start walking again. I've started in with Pokemon Go again. It's a fun little game and requires me to actually go outside. Last weekend, they had these adorable little pigs out in spades and I just had to go get one but I didn't haven any Poke Balls. So, I walked to the park in the 18 degree (negative windchill) weather and then I thought "Well, I've made it this far, might as well walk to City Hall." Then I got to City Hall and I thought, "I've made it this far, I might as well make it to the bakery". It was at the point that I made it to the bakery that I realized I had made a serious error in judgement. I had to walk back against the wind. But hey, I made it home with only mildly frozen extremities. I stopped to calculate how far I'd walked, and realized that I had made it 1.2 miles round trip. The entire down town is loaded with Poke Stops (and a wine bar), which leads me to the conclusion that I could rack up some serious mileage when the weather calms down. I now have another goal to pursue for stickers, chase Pokemon for 3 miles in a row. I'd also like to go to the chiropractor for more regular tune ups. With my age, weight, and pre-existing conditions, I have a lot of issues with my hip and lower back. I also think that I should get massages more regularly. I have heard that they can also help with some of my symptoms. With the onset of winter and my myriad distractions, it may appear that I have abandoned the Impossible Pants, but this is not so. I merely took a detour and have not taken any pictures because I know I've regressed and made no progress. The pursuit of the pants will resume in earnest very soon. But for now, I'm just going to enjoy the electric fire place and a mug of hot cocoa. Turns out the insurance company didn't want to pay for my CPAP machine and that's why I had to wait so long to get it. They said that there is still a chance that the insurance company will deny the claim even after they have said they will cover it. This is so frustrating, but I have my machine now and there's not much I can do now but wait and see. I haven't had any miraculous improvements in my sleep, but I've only had it for two nights and I have to get used to sleeping with a contraption on my face. I can say that I don't have headaches when I wake up anymore, so far, and that's a good thing. No one actually went over the results of my sleep study with me, so I have no idea what they found other than I have apnea.
In other news, I was sad that I gained a lot of weight over the last two months, then I was relieved because the insurance nurse's scale said I had not gained that much, then I was sad again because we bought a new scale and it agreed with our first scale. After all that drama, I can now say with confidence that I have definitely gained back 25 of the pounds I originally lost. And, worst of all, I gained all that in less than two months. What I don't get is that all of my smaller clothes still fit, all be it a little more snugly, but they aren't busting at the seams. It doesn't make any sense. I know I have been eating poorly, really poorly, and not controlling my portions, but I still don't understand how I've stayed the same size. People say it's because I've been going to the gym, but 2 days a week of personal training doesn't put on 25 pounds of muscle. I'm still working on my stickers though, and up to 14. I think part of my problem is that I get overwhelmed. My brain gets all worked up about all the things I need to do, or want to accomplish and then says "Forget this, we can't do this, lets just watch Netflix and eat stuff." It's just part of my eternal struggle for a happy medium. Right now, I'm just waiting for the sunshine I was promised and trying to convince myself to put on pants. I'll let you know how that goes. |
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June 2023
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