I hear that whistle blowing as the train is coming down the track - choo choo! It's the doom train - all aboard. Am I being melodramatic? Absolutely! Am I stress eating sea salt milk chocolate caramels? Damn skippy. If we are being honest here, I like to be in control. As Hedwig once said, "The thrill of control, like the rush of rock and roll, it's the sweetest taste I know..." Right now, I am in control of a clear plastic container of chocolates and that's about it.
The store I manage is closing at the end of the month, I'm studying for an insurance licensing exam with four million pages of material, and I can't will my body to do as I command. Also, I have anxiety and I refuse to be medicated (but that's a story for another day). Writing helps. There is something soothing about the clicking sound of the keys. Plus, I am easily distracted so when I write, I start thinking about other things. Like manatees. Now there is a species that knows how to relax. They spend up to 50% of their day sleeping and the rest of it eating. Oh, my god! I just realized that sea cows are my spirit animal. I know what I need - to go to the pool or better yet, the hot tub. I am convinced that manatees have it all figured out. I feel better now. |
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December 2022
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