A friend sent me a really great video about a thing called The Wall of Awful. There are actually two parts - defining what the wall is and how to get over it. But, suffice it to say that I’m staring a wall down at this very moment. Basically, the WOA (wall of awful), is the inability to do even a simple task because of the enormous amount of baggage that stands in front of it. Previous bad experiences, trauma, negative self talk, anxiety, doubt, just a whole shit load of bricks piled up between you and the thing you want/need to do.
On the other side of my current wall is my podcast and the Mic Drop Workshop, two things I’m excited and terrified by in equal measure. Yes, ADHD and executive dysfunction are part of the mix, but the other part is fear of failure (or even worse, insignificance). What if I put all this energy and time into creating a podcast and writing a keynote speech and literally no one gives a shit? Or worse, the internet trolls come out from under their bridges and validate all of the things I secretly fear about myself? Oh, well - I guess.
That’s a new mantra I’m trying to make stick “Oh well”. I got the idea from an Instagram Post by Jess Ekstrom (who is one of the top 5 most inspiring people I know of). Instead of falling into a well of what if’s and despair, we decide to let the negative be part of the growth process. When something bad happens, say “Oh well” and see how that feels. No one listens to my podcast? Oh well. No one wants to pay me to speak? Oh well.
It might sound a little callous or even counterproductive, but hear me out: what if it is really teaching us to just let that shit go? We’re going to try, we’re going to fail and sometimes epically, but so what? I just read the most incredible post from a family friend who had to stop running a 250 mile marathon he’d been training to do for over a year because of a knee injury. In talking about the experience, he said, “If there isn’t a significant chance of failure, then what you’re doing must not be very difficult. I will heal-up, learn, adjust, move on, improve, and fail until I succeed.”
That is the embodiment of “oh well”. Take on the challenging things, the things that terrify you, and embrace the possibility of falling on your face. We will never know what is possible if we don’t try.
Creating my own sunshine 🌞