The one two punch...

I am now "that" person. I've just called the doctors office after my doctor and the ER doctor have already called just trying to see if they could please, please find a place for me in the schedule. If any of you have see my Facebook posts, then you will know that it's been a long, long last week and a half. 
It all started on the night of Tuesday, April 24th. I was having raging stomach pains, like glass was trying to move through me and I started throwing up and couldn't stop. Every half hour between 9:30 p.m. and 4:00 a.m., I was awoken by this terrible pain. At 4:30, I finally dressed and drug myself to the ER (Ian was sleeping and had to work, I could have woken him but I wasn't exactly in the most coherent state of mind. I realize now that I should have woken him).
In the ER, they gave me morphine for pain, zofran for nausea, and then took an x-ray (they didn't find much out of the ordinary except that I was a bit "backed up"). So they sent me home with instructions to drink half a bottle of Miralax dissolved in 64 oz of sports drink. Yes, that is a lot of Miralax, and no, it did not work as you'd expect (at least not at first. Let's just say it's a good thing I had left over Depends from my gallbladder surgery). I felt awful, but better than the night before, so I just decided to let it pass (no pun intended). Then all hell broke lose again. Around 7 or 8 that evening (Wednesday, April 25th), the debilitating pain started surging through my guts again.
I was vomiting like Linda Blair and then just kept going when there was nothing left. There was a horrible cacophony of dry heaving, crying, and just a touch of yelling. Around 9, Ian put his shoes on and took me back to the ER. More fluids, morphine, and zofran followed by a CT. This time they found a 7cm cyst on my right ovary, but said that would not cause these symptoms. They gave me a GI cocktail to drink that had lidocane (the stuff that numbs you at a dentist office). They told me to get in touch with my OB and in the mean time, sent home prescriptions for intestinal cramping and a bunch of other stuff that is now a blur. We went home in the wee hours of the morning and I immediately made an appointment with my doctor.
My brother took me to my appointment around 9 a.m. on Thursday April 26th. My doctor was extremely sympathetic and prescribed me medication for pain and something else to help things move (they were still thinking it was an intestinal issue at this point). I didn't even make it to the pharmacist. Little brother ended up dropping me back off at the ER for more fluids, morphine, and zofran. They told me that there wasn't much more they could do and that they had contacted my OB and I was to set up an appointment for the next day. Before I left, the morphine was already starting to wear off and I had started dry heaving into the little pink barf pan they give you (I should sideline here to say that I had brought my own bucket as I couldn't seem to stop vomiting). While balling and heaving, they gave me a shot in the hip of morphine and discharged me. I tried taking the 4-5 different prescriptions they had given me, but nothing was working. By 10 p.m., I was a shell of the human being I had been before this all started. Ian loaded me and my bucket into the car and drove us to Salina to meet my mom. We just decided to stop at the ER there as it was clear I wouldn't make it much further.
My poor, sweet husband was himself exhausted and had no idea how to get to the Salina hospital when I started ugly dry heaving in the bucket again. We drive a Prius, let's just say it was close quarters. I gave him directions through bouts of tossing my cookies, and luckily we got there safely without him tossing his. At around 11:30 p.m. we got registered at the Salina ER.
I can't express to you the kind of pain I was in. Really, it felt like a horrible alien creature was trying to shred it's way through my insides. This time, they gave me morphine and compazine. I will remember that drug as long as I live. It induced a horrible panic attack, so on top of being in great pain, I began to trip balls. I was shivering and freaking out and just wanted to run away. Mom tried to soothe me and very sternly told me that my IV was staying in (thanks mom for not letting me rip it out and run through the ER screaming). In the midst of all this, they discovered that I also had a bladder infection and decided to hell with it, and admitted me. Finally, at 4:00 a.m. on Friday, April 26th, I was taken to my room at Salina Regional Hospital.
I stayed at the hospital until Monday, April 30th. They scoped me, x-rayed me, CAT scanned me and came to the conclusion that my bowels are fine and so is my kidney. This is the result of the very large cyst on my ovary. Unfortunately, they can't remove said ovary at that facility due to my extensive adhesions. They released me back into the wild after I ate my first solid food in days, and set up an appointment with my OB for May 10. Dude.
Suffice it to say, that my first night home did not go well. The vomiting began again, and I had to return to the Hays, ER on Monday night. Another trip to my doctor who put me back on a liquid diet and a strict pain killer regimen. God bless pain meds. I FINALLY slept through the night. I'm delirious, weak, covered in bruises (from all the blood draws and IV's), but I'm sleeping. And, as I'm writing this blog, the OB called back and said that they can squeeze me in at 10:45 tomorrow! I'm not sure what the future holds, but whatever it is, say a prayer for me. I'll let you know how it goes.